Although the incidence of cases of coronavirus has not stopped growing in recent weeks and that the sixth wave will mark the future of this Christmas due to the expansion of the omicron variant , the Spanish have recovered spending levels in 2021 pre-pandemic. According to the latest study published by the OCU at the beginning of this month of December, the average expenditure per person will be 641 euros (22% more than in 2020), of which the item that clearly takes the cake are gifts for children and older than Santa Claus and Kings.
According to this survey, we Spaniards like to give and receive gifts. On gifts alone, respondents expect to spend an average of 348 euros , which is divided into 173 euros on gifts for children (114 on toys) and 175 euros on gifts for adults.
A table with the typical Christmas decoration.
However, not everyone likes to give and receive gifts . In fact, there are many people who, far from enjoying the process of looking for and buying gifts, end up overwhelmed and others who experience the situation of receiving them with great anxiety. What is this about? The experts from the Open University of Catalonia (UOC) Diego Redolar and José Ramón Ubieto shed light on the matter and explain why some people enjoy giving and receiving presents while for others it is almost a martyrdom.
The first question they address is how the brain reacts to these stimuli and why, in general, humans enjoy receiving a gift. “When we receive a gift there is a double benefit: the pleasure regions of our brain (neural reinforcement system) are activated and also our more emotional brain. The critical structures for the processing of emotional information are put into operation, especially the amygdala or the prefrontal cortex, more linked to social cognition “, explains Redolar, neuroscientist and professor at the UOC’s Studies in Psychology and Education Sciences. “Humans and primates really like to feel that someone has cared for them . “
The expert also clarifies that there is a notable difference between receiving a material object as a gift or an experience since they produce a different impact on people’s memory . “Material things are forgotten more quickly. Normally, an experience corresponds to an episodic memory that has more emotional connotation. This episodic memory depends on the hippocampus, and what gives it the emotional meaning is the amygdala,” says Redolar, also a researcher at the Cognitive NeuroLab and director of the Neuromodulation and Neuroimaging unit of the Brain 360 Institute.
Happiness chemicals
What chemicals are put in place when a gift is given or received? Mainly four: oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin and endorphins . As a general rule, when people exchange presents, the levels of these substances rise, generating a feeling of happiness and well-being.
Girl hugging her dog.
Oxytocin, known as the hormone of social cognition, helps us build confidence and develop all of our emotional relationships . “Hugging, giving or receiving gifts is one way to get this hormone to flow,” says Redolar.
On the other hand, for example, trying to find a highly sought after product to give to a person and finally finding it gives the person who gives a very rewarding reward and causes the brain to release dopamine.
When a person feels important, in addition, his brain releases serotonin: “This neurotransmitter, related to the control of emotions, is considered a substance of critical importance for the regulation of mood”, points out the UOC professor. Therefore, a person a gift is a way to make them feel important and thus increase their level of happiness .
Finally, sharing activities that we like, such as two people going to find a gift for a third that they appreciate or receiving a gift that one does not expect, causes the levels of endorphins to rise naturally, a substance that acts as a natural analgesic and that also causes feeling of well-being .
How to manage the anxiety of seeking or receiving a gift
But, how to manage the anxiety that can cause us to look for a gift for a loved one or to receive it? According to the expert, there are people for whom it generates a lot of stress not knowing what to give to their family and / or friends . “The lack of information is the cause of this feeling,” warns Redolar. “The human being, when he has to make a decision, likes to have contextual information. If he does not have it, the prefrontal cortex is forced to make an effort to decide what to do, and this can generate this anxiety.”
Various studies indicate that the expectations that are generated can make it a stressful experience . When a gift is given, we are on the alert and see if there is any clue that could indicate whether the recipient is satisfied or not. If we don’t get the response we expected, we may be disappointed . Similarly, the recipient may feel pressured to show satisfaction , even if it is a gift they don’t want.
José Ramón Ubieto , collaborating professor at the UOC’s Studies in Psychology and Education Sciences, explains that this anxiety occurs especially in those people who are too aware of the other : “Whether they will please him or not; and from here it arises the anxiety, of thinking about the fact of not having hit the mark, “he remarks.
How can this anxiety be reduced? The expert offers three recommendations with the aim of guiding you in the search for a gift and reducing stress . First of all, risk a little and try to find something that the other does not usually do. “For example, giving away an excursion, a ticket to the theater, etc. If you don’t end up liking it, at least you can think that the other person has been offered the opportunity to discover something new. This can make us feel more satisfied with ourselves ”.
It can also help to keep in mind what is particular about the other . What interests the other does not always have to coincide with what we like. “We can risk and give a new experience keeping in mind what field of interests he has. Perhaps he is a person who does not go to the theater, but who likes everything related to art”, explains the psychologist.
Ubieto indicates that finding a person who does not like receiving gifts is less common. In these cases, he recommends whoever receives it to put himself in the shoes of the other and to think that he has done it with the will to surprise him. “You have to take the moment as a challenge, as a novelty that you can enjoy. If it really is something that you do not like, you can always try to change it, and it is a way of accepting the gift of the other. to like the gesture that our son has given us a gift, but not the gift itself ”.
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